Yes or No?

Pythagoras is noted as saying: "the oldest, shortest words - 'yes' and 'no' - are those which require the most thought." This was something I learned through personal experience. These two words require "the most thought" because of needing to know when to say which one and why. 

Eventually, I learned that I had to, ocassionally, step away from any situation that may be demanding an immediate commitment, a yes or no answer, even for a moment or two. Doing this gave me time to weigh the situation. To ask myself if my response was coming from me or if my mind was being affected in order to appease another's wishes.

Before learning this, I was a serious "people pleaser." Saying no was one of the most difficult things for me. Which means, I often felt used because of it. One day, a friend said: "You know, it's ok to say no. In fact, the more you say it, the easier it gets." She was right, it works and I have no difficulty saying it now - when I need to do so. I've also learned not to feel guilty over it as well. In fact, under certain circumstances, the life I save may be my own.

Lastly, this was another difficult but very important lesson that I, eventually, learned: whatever you decide, commit to it and don't look back later with regrets or a sour attitude. If it doesn't turn out as you thought it might, or things don't go well with the relationship later, don't forget that you, ultimately, allowed your decision. Learn from it and move on. If for no other reason than allowing your peace of mind.